Home Games & Tech A Comparison in Self-Aggrandisement: Pretentious Game vs. Angry Birds Go!

A Comparison in Self-Aggrandisement: Pretentious Game vs. Angry Birds Go!



Pretentious Game tells the story of a little blue square that falls in love, and his quest to prove himself. I can’t tell you more than that without a large spoiler warning, which you wouldn’t want, but if there’s a prize for becoming emotionally attached to a square…well, actually, Thomas Was Alone would probably win. But Pretentious would be in the audience. ABG, on the other hand, feels the need to stitch a narrative to each race for no reason. Mario Kart didn’t need a story to explain why beating Bowser and Wario on Rainbow Road would save the Mushroom Kingdom – ABG should take note.

Pretentious: 1

Angry Birds Go!: 0



Pretentious Game’s jump from Flash games to portable gaming really makes use of the touch-screen hardware combined with ironic and punny instructions. While you’re still a lab rat, pushing the right buttons at the right time, it makes you feel more like Brain than Pinky. However, there is one level where the implied instructions have absolutely no bearing on how you beat the level, and being pulled out of the game to look at a walkthrough is never good. ABG wins because the intuitive tilt controls and ease between tilting and drifting make it a really smooth switch for players from handheld racing games, especially in such a gorgeously designed environment (which I suppose is easier to pull off when Rovio is spending more money on looking good than most students pay in University fees.)

Pretentious: 1

Angry Birds Go!: 1


In-App Purchases

For 69p you can buy chapters two and three of Pretentious Game, which actually provides variation of the story rather than just more of the same. The end of Chapter Three is a great example of using the mechanics of the game as a metaphor for character development. For £34.99 in ABG, you can buy a kart. One kart. And it doesn’t tell you the cost of the kart until you’ve put in your account information, so I’m expecting stories of children wiping out their parents’ credit cards on coins and gems (why do birds need gems to build cars?) within the week.

Pretentious: 2

Angry Birds Go!: 1


Can I actually play the game?

Pretentious Game loaded up on my iPhone 4S immediately. Angry Birds Go! crashed five times and wouldn’t let me play until I closed all other apps, turned it off, and turned it back on again.

Pretentious: 3

Angry Birds Go!: 1


Final Result:

Pretentious Game:  ★★★☆☆

Angry Birds Go!: ★★☆☆☆ (Just to be kind)



Adam Smith (@webnym)

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