Home Comment Shut-eye on Streatham – ranking the napping hotspots

Shut-eye on Streatham – ranking the napping hotspots

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James Pidduck, expert campus napper, divulges his assessments of the most popular places on campus to gain some sneaky shut-eye at those times when the walk home is just too draining to handle.

 

We’ve all been there. That battle between our refusal to head home before a certain word count has been reached, and the increasing weight of our weary eyelids. It’s not a nice place to be, but its a frequent position for many of us – myself included. As a self-confessed master of the all-nighter, and once even the dual-nighter (pretending the deadline was the day before, not getting it done through the night, then having to face the actual all-nighter – would not recommend if you appreciate a functioning brain/body), it’s safe to say that these evaluations are in experienced, if often fatigued, hands. So, try to hold those eyes open and take a read of Comment’s guide to campus’ hotspots – which will soothe your tired torso like a lyrical lullaby, and which will shake you awake more violently than your hips in Arena last Monday?

 

1/5 = The library – It’s design is strictly clinical, and it’s dressed head to toe in garish shades of yellow, orange and green. The lib and I are already having some issues. Although the most obvious place to give in to The Sandman when working, the library just simply doesn’t indulge the needs of the campus napper – most notably, that colour scheme. The permanent lighting throughout is another deal breaker, strong enough to penetrate the realm of unconsciousness to morph that relaxing snooze into the most nerve-racking of nightmares. In addition, the library can become a highly political space during deadline fever, as I’m sure you all know. Openly taking a nap in a much-coveted seat that could be used by the hardcore worker could leave you victim to some serious sass – you have been warned.

 

nap careerzone2/5 = The Career Zone – I have actually managed some shut-eye here after an all-night cram sesh before an exam, and said exam actually went okay… could this hotspot be a good luck charm for the weary worker? I may have to research further. However, this space does not present itself as a napping utopia once fully investigated. Heavily windowed, the overly generous allowance of natural light could be a beast when the sun’s having one of its strong days (rare in Exe, but still), forcing you to rudely awaken before your body is fully nourished. Furthermore, this small and compact workspace means your slumber will most likely be in full view of those around you, not to mention the judging glances of those career advisers. Openly snoozing in what is meant to be the hub of dynamic futures on campus… doesn’t bode too well for your post-uni prospects. Would they believe that you’re actually rehearsing for that modelling gig for Dreams next week, the latest string in your bow of your high-flying career? Probably not.

 

3/5 = The Loft – It’s the newest study space, and with that comes the newest of opportunities. The Loft has a pretty calm vibe, but I’m thinking in particular about those pod-type seats (pictured). Essentially a throne for the subtle sleeper, you can even turn this architectural phenomenon to face the wall if the shame is too much. Offering full support for both neck and back, this won’t allow your excess tiredness to get the better of your posture – there’s nothing worse than awaking with a stiff neck after an awkward head-on-the-table manoeuvre. Pity the fool who didn’t settle down in one of these.

 

 

nap dh14/5 = DH1 – Beanbags galore. Soft-to-the-touch sofas. The finest of armchairs. Guild done good. It’s as if they designed campus’s latest renovated space knowing my flagging body would settle here for some short-term hibernation. So, thank you – it means a lot. The variety of spaces and surfaces to nap upon is simply sublime – the sheer excitement of the choice might even spark you back into an energised state. But when this buzz dies down, you’re in for a treat, my friends. Forget the rowdy pub crawl, did someone say nap crawl? I’m thinking 45 minutes at each station, before moving onto the next spot. Let me at it, I’m getting crunk on nap time tonight.

 

5/5 = Pieminister – The booths of Pieminister are ideal for those particularly fond of the horizontal nap, my personal fave. Ladies and gents, this is about the closest thing you’re going to get to a bed on campus, so lap it up like a Belieber googling those saucy Calvin Klein ads. The lights even turn off if no movement has been detected – an automatic light switch. Ideal. Pack a blanket, and you may have found utopia. This could well be ‘The Ritz’ of campus napping.

 

 

Note: only the library, DH1 and Pieminister are open come nightfall, so plan carefully if you predict your nap-page to enter those later hours. There’s nothing worse than being awakened by university staff when they need to close the room off. The shame.

On reflection, maybe it’s time for a nap room on campus? The campaign starts here.

 

James Pidduck, Online Comment Editor

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