Exeter, Devon UK • Dec 5, 2023 • VOL XII

Exeter, Devon UK • [date-today] • VOL XII
Home FeaturesColumnists Wacky Races

Wacky Races

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ith the UKIP leadership campaign in full swing, political fanatics around the country are wondering which insane kook will be spreading bigotry next. Like a wine stain on a white carpet, Farage is back reminding Britain of it’s bad decisions. Dick Dastardly, aka Paul Nuttall, told Sky News that if he won the leadership campaign he would aim to secure Farage a seat in the House of Lords – a ‘fitting tribute to the man who gave us Brexit’. Brilliant idea.

Now let’s take a minute to evaluate the sheer stupidity of this statement. Farage, the ignorant frog-like man who convinced the nation to vote for a decision that was based on lies and fear, which then destroyed the economy, and who then essentially buggered off. This is the man ‘Nutjob’ wants to make or break the laws in our country.

Image: Flickr.

Farage, the frog who will won’t stop croaking. Image: Flickr.

All of this comes only weeks after new UKIP leader Diane James quit following 18 days in office, proving she has bigger commitment issues than even Kim Kardashian. Farage had previously stated he would not return to the leadership position ‘for $10 million’. Well, someone clearly coughed up –  as he is back at it again, clearly emulating one of those irritatingly inextinguishable birthday candles. And just as a reminder to readers: this man failed to become an MP seven times, and was then miraculously elected leader of his party.

Caricature politicians are the new norm. Image: Flickr.

Caricature politicians are the new norm. Image: Flickr.

This leads me on to address a crisis that is quickly developing in countries all across the world. Idiot politicians. When was it acceptable for politicians to go on talk-shows, outwardly confess racist propensities, and display sheer – for lack of a better existing word – ‘dumbassery’? We need to bring back the days of likeable, respectful, well-dressed politicians, with real credentials (Trump University does not count) and a real passion for change. We do not need whimpering imbeciles who have no backbone and lack basic people skills.

Elections these days ask the public to vote for the better of two evils. How is this justifiable? The American election asks its people to vote between ignorance and corruption, and the British public had absolutely no say in their new prime minister. It is evident that the electoral system, in most countries, is flawed. And the answer to this? I haven’t got a clue. But in the words of David Bowie; ‘look at those cavemen go, it’s the freakiest show…’.

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