“They’re just not my type”: the vagaries of types
Gracie Moore discusses what her ideal date is, as well as troubles the specificity implied by having a “type”.
As a bisexual woman, I’m not well versed in giving an exact “type” to the people I seek to date. If I had to sum it up in a phrase, it would be men who are pretty the way girls usually are and women who are handsome in the way boys are. I would say it’s completely reductive to label a type on physical appearance but, the truth is, part of a healthy romantic or sexual relationship is being physically attracted to the other person. Personally, the traits I find most attractive are generally vague and varying. For example, as much as it doesn’t matter in the slightest, I do find myself more attracted to men who are give or take around the same height as me (although I am partial to a short king) and typically dress in a way which wouldn’t be out of place at Cavern Saturday. Again, this is less about my type and more about me analysing the boys I’ve been attracted to in the past. I immediately become more physically attracted to people as I discover more about them.
-this is less about my type and more about me analysing the boys I’ve been attracted to in the past.
As we age, our types become less about the person’s aesthetics and more about the interesting aspects they add to our lives. For example, people who read books regularly and are very intellectual are around a hundred times hotter than their non-book loving counterparts – it’s important to me that we have the same interests or at the very least, they are open to supporting and engaging in my interests. Also, I like to be challenged to grow in a healthy way both by my friends and the people I’d choose to date: Einstein once said (and it’s true) that if you’re the smartest person in the room, then you’re in the wrong room. This obviously can refer to the academic side of intelligence but for me, it’s also about being worldly wise and willing to adapt to become a better person. Also, my favourite trait in anyone is humour. I’m an extremely sarcastic person and like to be the one to make people laugh but when someone can do the same back to me, I find myself automatically attracted to them.
-think about what serves you emotionally and seek this out in people form.
I haven’t been on a whole heap of dates in my life but I would say for anyone trying to discover the kind of people they’re into: think about what serves you emotionally and seek this out in people form. Whether that be through hobbies or personality traits, it’s essential that you can connect with them on an emotional platform because looks fade and they need to be able to provide more than just nice abs or pretty eyes.
