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Home / Lifestyle

Abstinence and academia

by Graham Moore

A night out at university can involve a lot of pressure – pressure to socialise, pressure to drink, and often pressure to look for something a little more… intimate. When Timepiece’s oversized clock ushers in the early hours of the morning, it can be a little discomforting – as you look around the carnal, sweat-soaked scenes so often painted by a student night out – to be the only one who didn’t turn up with sex as an apparent priority.

Alcohol can lead to all kinds of interesting decisions, but for some of us casual sex just doesn’t tend to be one of them. And that’s okay. Just as it’s perfectly fine to go out looking for someone, it’s also perfectly fine to venture out of an evening with the express intention of ending up back home, gathered around your kitchen table with cups of tea, as the room spins hazily around you. Whilst sexual activity is undeniably a component of student life for many, it is not – despite what stereotypes may suggest – a vital one. In my experience, as someone who is not typically interested in casual sex, university life has not been any less fulfilling.

In my experience, as someone who is not typically interested in casual sex, university life has not been any less fulfilling.

Yes, there is pressure – but only because for many, university provides a time when they can explore their sexuality. If you’re not ready for, or interested in, that side of university then have no fear. University abounds with new and exciting things to do, and sex is just one small option in that field. And whilst university is a great time to push your boundaries, this does not mean that you have to do something that makes you feel uncomfortable in order to fit with what everyone else seems to be doing – quite the opposite, in fact. Use your time at university to discover what you enjoy doing – whether that involves having sex with other people or not.

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